Mama, we're all full of lies . . .

We got up so early for work this morning, we should have gotten some kind of award. Yesterday we didn't get up quick enough, so Nikki's uncle decided to try to set the fire alarms off to get us to move faster. So he set a paper bag on fire in the basement. Nikki heard a bunch of explatives, which basically meant that it got too hot for him and he dropped it. Then she heard thumping sounds which meant that he was trying to stomp it out on the ground. When I came to, I sat up and asked "is something burning?" and Nikki replied from the other side of the room "yeah, it's just the carpet". From the calm response I figured that it was no danger to me, so I took my time getting out of bed where I saw the big black spot where the fire had charred the carpet.

Nikki's aunt wasn't happy at all.

So this morning we avoided all that and headed into the office to gather our materials and start work early. Nikki's uncle hadnt even gotten to the office, so I was proud. Do you know who works at the office yet? Well just in case . . .

Kimberly: She has an awesome Star Trek ship phone but she quit because she was about to get fired and saw it coming. Mr. Brightfield is currently looking for a replacement.

Mary: A Taiwanese Jesus freak who goes to religious conferences every weekend. She's been slacking lately, Mr. Brightfield isnt pleased. He said ever since her serious boyfriend broke up with her like a year and a half ago, she's gotten crazier and crazier. And gained about 50 pounds.

Katherine: A skinny lady with black hair almost in a bob. Late 40s maybe? Instead of sitting in a chair she sits on a big silver yoga ball that I swear I'm gonna give a good wind-up kick to one day. One of those one's where you bring your foot all the way back almost to your head like in the cartoons. I used to smile at her but she just scowls so I dont bother. The only time I've ever seen her smile was when she was talking to some dude "Bobby" on the phone because she was doing the flirty voice and saying that she wouldn't be able to meet him somewhere this weekend. I thought it was her boyfriend or something . . . nope. Bobby is a client. So now shes a corporate ho AND a bitter old crow. She hates us because she thinks we're unprofessional because we laugh sometimes. Like actually, thats why she doesn't like us. And the first day when we were new and didn't know how many pictures to take, she said we were wasting our time cause we didnt have more than a thousand. And she called Nikki a fashionista. Mind you, she's never said a word to our faces, she just talks about us behind our backs. So Nikki devotes a lot of time to trying piss her off.

James: Cutie! He's really nice to us, I like him.

Joe: He hasn't talked to us much but he has really nice shoes and always smiles.

Franco: CUTE!! He's from . . . I can't remember where he's from but they have a lot of tropical fruits and not many vegetables. He's gay but he wont admit it.

Susan: She runs facebook. Well not really, but she's awesome. ((Long story)).

Kiki: She's pretty funny, she helped us out with learning how to take good pictures for Mr. Brightfield. She thinks that the different brands of gum us kids have to choose from these days is astounding.

Robin: She's black.

Alright so anyway . . . . we walk in and I can't find the camera that I've been using for this whole week. So I look around and finally I think I spot it on Mary's desk. She's working on the computer so I ask:
"Is that Mr. Brightfield's camera or your camera?" She doesnt look up.
"It's the office camera."
"Oh, are you using it?"
"Well . . . I'll be referring to it"
"Oh, when do you think you'll be done?"
"I dunno"
"Ooookay . . ."
So I leave and Nikki and I go on a starbucks break and figure we'll get the camera when she's done. When we get back to the office Mr. Brightfield asks us why we didn't take the camera and we said because Mary was using it. But she wasn't. At all. LIES. This made him really angry, he said he's tired of Mary being a jerk. We're pretty sure Mary's hanging by a thread these days . . .

We moved on to sector 3 today and it was a lot smaller than sectors 1 and 2 so we finished a little bit early. Sometimes when we finish early we go back and organize the office. We got to the file cabinets and stuff and next I want to work on their food drawers. I opened one that was all sticky and full of soy sauce, which I'm pretty sure is Mary's fault. On the bright side, we're getting really good at taking pictures, I think, and we're a lot more efficient. But thats as long as I do the navigating cause Nikki's sense of direction is . . . . subpar. Only 12 more sectors to go!!

Nikki's getting a pair of shoes delivered to the office tomorrow to piss Katherine off. Lord have mercy . . .

A Gam